Astral-Enigma

I hear you in the other room. Laughing. Joking. Having fun. You forgot about me sat out here. You forgot you were going to talk to me. You forgot to care. You don't really care that I'm upset. You don't really care that I'm down. You don't really care that I'm bleeding. I thought you cared...

"i nearly fucked a guy" "there" "said it" blank. shaking. scared. i thought we had something i was scared last time that distance would hurt me you said not to worry that there wasn't anyone else trust is such an underrated quality these days i trusted you. i didn't try and find anyone else because i believed you crushed. forgotten. "bye"

I talk to her and my soul spills. She finds me, alone. Purposely retreated from the world. Surrounded by dreams and illusions, trying to forget that, Out there is fear Out there is pain Out there is uncertainty and ill reactions Out there I cannot be me. She helps me forget, I am happy but, Leonard Cohen is on the stereo. A strange juxtaposition, that in a fitting way, Illustrates my life.

Each word you speak to me falls, Like a dew drenched rose petal. Illuminating in my soul, A glimmer of hope. Each time I see you, I see perfection. And this unexplainable emotion, Returns once again. Each time you hug me, Feels like a caress. Although fleeting, I feel it forever. Each time I think of you, I think of how much I love you. Each time I dream of you, I think of what could be. Each second that I am with you is heaven. And I wish that it was eternal, Endless and unchanging. Restless and wild as the tides, But calm and peaceful like a lazy summer aftermoon. Light and bubbly as a carefree laugh, But dark and pass

There's no escape this time The blood red lines form a web across my wrist again The crushing blow was coming, I knew Before we'd even talked I'd seen the way you smiled at him, Seen it and blanked it Tried to pretend that It wasn't real Fantasy only goes so far And now The cold, hard agony Returns It's only a matter of time Weeks, days, hours... Who knows? I'll always remember the times I spent with you The happiest days of my life I smiled then and it was real I tried, I really did I'll smile again, I'll go happy, don't worry about that...